Kindness and severity: psychologist's advice to help make parting less painful

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Kindness and severity: psychologist's advice to help make parting less painful
Kindness and severity: psychologist's advice to help make parting less painful
Anonim

Whether your relationship lasted for 5 days, 5 weeks, 5 months or 5 years, breakups are terrible, especially when you want to do it. Parting is like a rejection, but worse, because they happen after the person has opened up to you, respectively, exposed his soul and heart, becoming vulnerable. It is for this reason that breakups bring real pain, which is almost incomparable to rejection.

Tears can be hard on people who become initiators. Does it seem stupid? But in fact it is! The person who listens to the reasons for the breakup can only accept it and leave with their pain. But a person who decides to take this step goes through a difficult path. He thinks whether it is worth doing it, what to say, how to behave, and how to react if the partner cries?

These thoughts will swirl in your head. But don't let that stop you from making decisions. As impossible as it may seem, there are tips from experts that you can use during a breakup. In this article, we will get to know them so that this stage in life becomes less terrifying and problematic for you.

Need to be clear

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People usually want to break up with their partners when they don't see their views as similar to theirs. Your goals and desires seriously differ, sometimes even become opposite, so you no longer want to continue your life path hand in hand with this particular person. If you are on the verge of a break, clearly and clearly define the reason for yourself, then write it down. Then you just need to retell it to your partner so that he has no questions left and he would understand your point of view.

Parting is when all love is gone

Let's say it again: a breakup can be very hard and difficult if you still feel anything for your partner. If you are one hundred percent sure that a breakup is necessary, then your thoughts should not fill doubts, because this means that there are still feelings. Perhaps then you are rushing things or taking the wrong step?

Only when you do not have any emotions, you can start looking for reasons and suitable words to tell your partner about your decision. Remember that feelings can interfere with you, and you will just look terribly ridiculous in the eyes of your partner.

Be kind but strict at the same time

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Breaking up can be difficult for both parties. Therefore, while you're so fixated on getting your message right, remember to be kind and respectful. Give your partner time to accept everything you say. He also needs some time away from you to mourn. Do not violate the established boundaries, do not interfere in the life of the former half if she does not want, because in this way you can give a mixed signal about your attitude towards him. A person may think that feelings have returned, so he will begin to try to restore them himself, falling into a vicious circle of pain and rejection. Be respectful of other people's pain.

Find out how valuable a person is to you

Decide what value your partner had in your life - part with him accordingly. If you haven't been particularly close, it may take a few minutes for you to announce your decision to leave. If you had a good relationship, then meet in a restaurant, on neutral territory, where you can talk calmly about everything at dinner.

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