You can scatter. What will save a fading friendship: advice from psychologists

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You can scatter. What will save a fading friendship: advice from psychologists
You can scatter. What will save a fading friendship: advice from psychologists
Anonim

By and large, friendships are very reminiscent of love ones, because in order for friendship to be long and strong, you need constant work on it. The emotional closeness between friends can be very strong, but misunderstandings and quarrels, the difference in points of view on the surrounding life and forced separation due to external circumstances can cool down or nullify even the warmest and most sincere relationships. What to do in this case, how to revive the former friendship?

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Dispersed like ships at sea

In youth, when feelings and aspirations are very pure and naive, it seems to us that everything can change, but childhood best friends will always be with us. But the cycle of events of adult life gradually pushes them into the background, and one can only remember about strong friendship.

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Most often, the reason for losing contact with friends is changes in the personal life of one or both people. Someone gets married, gets married, goes to live in another city, gets a promotion. All this dramatically changes the habits and rhythm of a person's daily life. There is less and less time left for meetings and friendly conversations, and as a result, friends are gradually moving away from each other.

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In more complex cases, there is a conflict, after which neither side wants to be the first to make peace, and grievances can last for years. Sometimes none of the friends even remembers what started a series of omissions and disagreements, but the result is clear - the old friendship is over. Now let's figure out how you can avoid the worst-case scenario or try to reanimate friendly or friendly relations.

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Don't blame

Quarrels happen to everyone without exception. It is important to be able to analyze the situation with a cool head, without negative emotions and resentment, in order not to break off a good relationship due to an accidentally thrown phrase or word. We must understand that everyone is not perfect, and be able to forgive friends for mistakes.

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It is often worth just giving in, because a bad peace is better than a good quarrel. After the conflict, no matter how difficult it is, it is better to try not to leave forever, slamming the door loudly with your head held high, but to try to talk honestly with the person and dot the “and”. Psychologists advise you to try to take responsibility and listen to the arguments of your friend - perhaps then you will be able to find the key to maintaining an elusive friendship.

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Similarly, it is important to try not to hurt loved ones with your actions or words.

In general, honesty and the ability to critically look at the situation, first of all in relation to oneself, is the key to good and sincere relations with people.

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Leave pride and call

Why do we rarely call friends just like that, more often only when necessary, when we need advice or help? This greatly devalues human relations, reduces them to a consumer level.

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Yes, we are all busy with important things, and we literally do not have a minute of free time. But nowadays, thanks to technology, the connection speed has become just lightning fast. That's why it's so easy to pick up the phone and call an old friend just to see if everything is okay. Sometimes correspondence in messengers and social networks is not enough, and you just want to hear a lively voice and familiar intonations.

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